Do you remember this time last year? What you were doing? Where you were going?
Do you have days when you realize…..Wow, that was a YEAR ago…….really? It stuns you.
You can’t believe the time has flown by, that it’s December, almost Christmas and New Year’s (again).
I have glimpses of those years past all the time. Maybe, it’s just having a good memory, or from the photos I take.
For instance, I came across this photo.
This was at the end of the seven weeks casted at my friend Karen’s birthday party. My cast was pretty grimy and I had (almost) mastered being a one-handed (with a non-dominate left hand) typer, writer, hair washer, and eater extraordinaire. Amazing what you can do when you have to. However, my bowling was not so hot – at all. I always remember my cast this time of year, because I could NOT put up the tree one-handed.
Last Thanksgiving, this is what the girls looked like together. Crazy cute, right?
Still crazy cute!
What’s funny about this is Brownie. Last year, Molly had a death grip on Fred; my mom’s Shih-tzu and our love of Fred is the reason we ended up getting Brownie Poo in July.
Yesterday was my Dad’s birthday. His last birthday.
A year ago today, was the last day I hugged my dad, and kissed his cheek.
We drove to Ada on Saturday. Sydney made her first loooong driving trip in the driver’s seat under our supervision (notice I was in the backseat). She was fifteen with her freshly printed permit.
She did very, very good. We drove straight to the hospital where dad had checked himself in about a week or so before. He had a hernia that perforated part of his bowel and they had done surgery. I had talked to him on the phone, his birthday, and he sounded pretty weak. But fact is, he had worse things happen health-wise in his life. This wasn’t anything. But…in all the hustle and bustle of this time of year, I opted to just stop, and spend the day traveling to Oklahoma to see him. Just in case. IF something happened, I didn’t want to have any regrets, or I should haves….
We arrived to his room and he looked a little more worn than I expected, but better than what he had sounded on the phone. He did look older. Jason, Sydney, and I sat and visited for a while. I don’t like hospitals. I, especially, don’t like Valley View. My grandpa died there, my second cousin, my step-dad…..I just don’t like the place. The only thing good from Valley View was the memory of seeing my favorite aunt, dad’s sister, there. She used to work at the front desk and as a crazy teen I would stop by to see her. But she had moved to Houston many, many years ago.
Dad was watching football.
Dad was a man with nine and half-lives.
Dad was going to be fine.
I left the hospital room with a squeeze and a kiss fully knowing, I would see him again. At home, in front of his big screen TV, watching OU, with his trusty Buddy dog at his side.
We went to the local Mexican food place for my fill of queso with mushrooms from Polo’s. The only place that makes it just the way I looooves it. When we go to pay, I realize, I don’t have my purse. Now, you know what happens when a girl realizes she doesn’t have her purse, and all her worldly possessions on her persons.
It’s panic mode. I searched the car, the restaurant, the sidewalk……everywhere….and came up with only ONE place it could be. My dad’s hospital room.
Isn’t that strange? Because, I never lose my purse. Or forget it.
At first, I was a little irritated. We had said good-bye already. We were ready to hit the road for the long three hours of driving. What was this?
Then, I gathered my thoughts. I listened to my instincts. One thing I wished I had done was brought dad a present, or a card. In our rush, we had just taken off from Texas and came to the room empty-handed. So we went to the local Wal-Mart and I shopped for my dad’s Christmas. I shopped to cheer him up in that dreary white-walled hospital room. And I brought him his favorite things – OU stuff.
I also, picked up a Christmas fern plant in substitute for a Christmas tree, just in case, he was stuck there until close to Christmas.
He brightened up when we returned. It wasn’t just the gifts either. It was the surprise, the second visit in a day. I didn’t even mention my purse sitting on the empty hospital bed in his room. He kept wanting me to hold his blanket up so he could see all the colors (he is color blind like me). Reds he DOES see. The furry bear guy – which I have no idea what he has to do with OU – reminded him of his Buddy dog. He loved it. He had me lay it out on the bed next to where he was sitting. We admired the blanket. We admired the Christmas fern. We watched some football together, talked, and laughed. I left happy I had gone back. I needed that time and his smiles. No regrets. I knew, I just knew, he was going to be fine and recover – like always.
Dad passed away about midnight the next day of major heart failure.
My last-minute trip to Oklahoma. My return to that hospital room. It was no accident. It was a gift. My Christmas gift. From God, from dad, from the world of father’s and daughter’s. It was my last good-bye. My last memory.
Oh, how I cherish my favorite blanket.
Merry Christmas Dad. I miss you. I remember this day…has it really been a year?…and I’ll never forget it.
23 thoughts on “There is a story, for every day, of every year past.”
The last goodbye is really so touching…
What a powerful post. I am the kind of person with a very good memory…I remember little details, down to what someone wore or what someone ordered at a restaurant. However, during moments of grief or pain, I tend to muddle things together…except the week when my Gram passed away. I remember being in my apartment, alone, in NYC…hearing my mom’s voice on the other end, telling me how she wasn’t going to make it through the night. But, she did…and then another day…and another day…and finally, another day, until all of her children, grandchildren and other family members could be together with her. I’ll never forget the day she passed. I believe that day was a gift. I love this post…haven’t read one so moving in a long time. Thank you dear friend…and happy holidays!
This just went straight for the heart strings and the tear ducts, Angelia. None of us know how much time we get to spend here, this side of eternity. We need these reminders that the people in our lives matter more than anything else. Thank you so much for sharing this–you will pull a lot of strings (in a marvellous way) with this one.
Oh, and btw–Sydney looks like a preschooler driving that car!
Seems things happen for a reason…glad you forgot that purse and went back. I know Christmas without him will be tough, but memories are good. Hugs to you.
I’m crying. What a touching story. You really got me about your favorite blanket. There are no accidents, eh?
Thank you fo r sharing this.
Brought a tear and tugged at my heart…. he would be very proud of you my dear friend
Wow, this is heavy. What life can do to you. I admire you the way you can write about this.
It is so odd how so much can happen in a year…how much can change…
I’ll be keeping you in my thoughts.
This made me cry. 😦
I’m so glad you received that last visit with your father. It was a blessing.
…an angel…bringing you back on that day, a year ago…
And what a gift that was…what a gift you are…what a gift your family is…
It’s funny how much and how little can change in a years time, forgetting your purse and spending that last bit of time with your Dad was a blessing, I am proud you were blessed with that time.
it is crazy how much can happen in just one year…this is a really bittersweet and touching post 🙂
A beautiful post. Brought a tear to my eye. I think the first anniversary of a parent’s death, especially during the holiday season, is the most emotional. The reality of their being gone hasn’t completely sunk in yet. Personally, I tend to forget very easily, each new day seems to cancel out the last. I’m one of those people who live almost entirely in the present.
This brought tears to my eyes! I’ve been estranged from my father for three years now and I know it’s for legitimate reasons, but hearing your story makes me rethink my own 😦 Glad you had that last chance encounter with your dad. I can only imagine how heartbreaking it is to revisit it all over again a year later, but like you said, you can always remember it with no regrets! ((HUGS)))
What a touching post, Angelia. Everything does really happen for a reason, doesn’t it?
Oh. I’m sobbing. Literally sobbing. Such a beautiful post. We lost GC’s dad last year on Christmas day. I’m not looking forward to Christmas as much this year, but I know that we will plow through it. I hope I can remain as positive through it all as you are. Thank God for kids, right?
You sweet woman! I just adore you, and your wonderful writing skills. Could you please pass me that box of Kleenex??
I have tears rolling down my face. It’s amazing how things happen and what a blessing in that “forgotten” purse. I’m so glad you have that extra time with your Dad to remember : )
I’m glad you got to see your dad and it was definitely no coincidence. Sorry if my spelling is off. My brain start shutting down at 800 PM. Zzzzz . . . love the pics of your girls. They are beautiful!
What a touching post. I’m glad that you got to see your dad one more time.
Your family is adorable! I love the missing front teeth!
Love your Christmas Header.
I am so happy for you that you forgot your purse. Our Heavely Father is tricky (I think).
Hugs to you my distant friend.
(I am sorry I am so late/behind on reading posts. I will remember this year as the year I broke my toe—its been slowing me down and taking up my blog reading time.)