This is the time of the year, I panic.
Not only do I have zero Christmas gifts, but I have zero ideas.
Then there is the sheer exhaustion from working until six in the evening ,taking the commute home, and eating dinner. By the time I could go out, it’s later, colder, and darker. I don’t wanna.
On the weekends, I have more time. BUT, there are more crowds. Me + crowds = run, run far away.
Then there is the alternative. Surfing the web. I’m no good at shopping online. There are just too many choices.
And this whole vicious circle leads me to be depressed.
I get depressed, and all the sudden, I don’t like anything about myself. The way I look, what I write, the photos I take, my decisions, my actions…..etc, etc, etc. The list is long, and it’s ugly.
It is sooo silly. I know this.
And I am missing the whole point of Christmas, and the incredible gift that it is. The holy, and the beautiful.
Which makes me MORE depressed, because well, I must be a bad person to get depressed at Christmas.
So I stop the madness, and I appreciate the small things.
My amazing husband put up the Christmas tree. It is in a spot that I love because I can see the lights reflecting in every glass I walk by. From the living room to the kitchen to the back door to the front door – little twinkling lights in every window surface.
I love that.
He, also, hung with care our engagement ornament my sister made us. It has the date we got engaged.
What happy memories it brings….of our engagement….of our moment.
Every ornament tells a story.
I love that.
And I do love Christmas.
I just need to drop the stress, stop the worry, and embrace the love that surrounds us.
A little brighter bulb won’t hurt either.
How do you handle the holidays?