When a Blog is Reborn

I don’t watch sunrises. It is not in my genes. My genes love the night and the dark. It is under the the cover of darkness when I feel MOST awake. Mornings? Not so much! Mornings are for sleeping, or waking up.

But every once in a while, I like to do something different. To challenge myself, and on this one, I decided I would watch a sunrise…….on purpose.

Oh, it wasn’t easy. I tried to recruit my daughter and her boyfriend to go with me the night before. Told them to come to the hotel at 545am to pick me up. Of course they didn’t answer my call or text at 545am…..nor did they wake up before dawn (not even close).

I decided since I was awake (and determined) I would go see it on my own. I left my sleeping husband and children. I crept in the quiet through the hotel lobby. I took the car under a midnight sky. I drove past the base of Fort Sill, out into the Witchita Mountains of Oklahoma. On one side of the sky, stars twinkled high above, and on the other side of the sky, a blaze of color was rising.

I got anxious I wouldn’t make it to a stopping point. I kept looking from light to dark – wondering how close the race would be. Then, I ended up at a barrier. The top of Mount Scott did not open until 9am. Way after dawn. There was no way to get to the top to watch the sunrise (my brilliant plan).

Not to be deterred (I would SEE a sunrise!), I back-tracked to Lake Lawtonka.

I parked and walked down a street towards the lake. It was the closest I could get without being barred from getting closer.

This is where I ended up waiting.

And I didn’t miss it.

I got to watch every glorious moment of the sun rising.

As it moved inch by inch above the horizon.

At the base of Mount Scott on a mild morning in May.

I raced in the dark to witness the breaking. I navigated a dark path I had not navigated before. I set out to SEE the return of the sun.

A new time.

A new moment.

Alive and awake right before my eyes.

I sought the dawn.

And the dawn touched a place inside my soul that needed RENEWAL.

It needed to know the joys I had forgotten. The joys I let go of.

The joys of rebirth.

The joys of magic.

The joys of a new day.

The joys of a fresh start.

The joy of knowing no matter what your past, or your future holds……our purpose is not to END.

But to begin.

I embraced the stillness of the dawn. I let it cover me in encouragement and shine into the dark places.

What I thought meant to end? Only meant to become.

My dear blog, how I have missed you. I hope you don’t mind the make-over.

“Death is not extinguishing the light; it is only putting out the lamp because the dawn has come.”

Rabindranath Tagore quotes

For those that said I would be back? You were right! After three months, a new simpler design, and a pledge to combine both photography, writing, and family. I have returned with much JOY and thanksgiving.

Why I Blog

Let me count thy ways……

Well, originally, it was to tell my side of the story.

I was accused of stealing children, and harming pets – per my future husband’s ex-wife’s blog. We discovered it completely by accident. The barbs hurt. I won’t lie. They were completely untrue, but I understood. She had her own way of dealing with grief. Despite filing to divorce to grasp her independence for the first time – when you have two young children – it’s a whole new world. It’s hard. There is a lot of growing pains.

But it created this blog engine-that-could in me. I got to tell my side of the Cooper Story. Regardless if she read it or not, it helped my grieving process and I can’t thank her enough for igniting my desire. So, I understand, and I have no hard feelings.

What started out as my love of writing, then morphed into a crazy camera obsession. All these great photographs in blogland, I couldn’t resist the siren call of the DSLR.

I discovered a wonderful support system of bloggers uniting to encourage and support each other. We danced in the car. We blogged for a cause. I met many in person and those meetings are precious to me – Lance, Peggy, Christy, and Peedee.

The beginning of one the hardest, most trying times in my life, has ended up being the richest experience in the world. I found my heaven and haven.

I blog to continue that enrichment. To reach boundaries, and cross them. To do and try things, I never thought I could do. I blog my life in hopes of inspiring yours. For better, or for worse. For love, and for life.

I know there are ups and downs. Times I want to quit. Times I can’t get enough. A hundred comments one day, eight the next. What joy would it be, if it’s not a thrilling ride? And thrilled I am, as I sprint to that next turn in the road of photography, writing, and marriage. All right here on my little blog that could – Living, Loving, Laughing.

That’s why I blog, why do you?