Breathe and Believe

On February 12, 2021February 12, 2021 By AngeliaIn Angels among UsLeave a comment

Breathe and Believe.

This is a phrase I have repeated to myself many times during this pandemic. Life upended when news of the virus broke out but most especially in the travel industry where I built my career. Business travel came to a stand still. This wasn’t the first time. Change happens in travel and when it does this is what we do. Breathe in, breathe out, and breathe through, and believe with every fiber of our being that challenges do not last forever. We can use this time to strengthen and empower ourselves to endure our hurdles. We will adapt to the new way, whatever that is, and come out the other side more resilient than ever. Our ability to progress and move through difficulty is what our industry does best.

Breathe and Believe.

These words had new meaning for me as my sister, Deedy Breaux, fought Covid-19 pneumonia in the Clearlake Methodist ICU. I had to tell my self. Have faith! DO NOT GIVE UP! The longest night of my 2020 was not in March when travel went quiet. It was the cold night of November 19^th as I awaited news of my sister’s fate. I knew it was very dire; a deadly virus, a caring nurse, and a DNR directive. This hero who dedicated herself to every child she cared for in one of the largest children’s hospitals in the state of Texas lay fighting all alone. It hit me in the gut. It forced me to my knees. I knew. I just knew she could be on her last breath. I prayed she’d wore enough PPE to reduce the viral load at exposure. I hoped the experimental treatments responded in her blood. The last words I heard from her by text said “I can’t even get enough air to cough. I love you so much. Don’t stop praying for me.”

Breathe and Believe.

It’s all we have. It’s all we need.

My sister survived when others have not. Her healing a Godsend we all needed. A happy ending we had to know was possible. The travel industry will survive as well. As we pass through these days into the next part of history. Let us all remember to have faith. Walk in whatever spiritual peace you are in. Take care of your health. Find joy in all you do. Laugh every day. But most of all…

Breathe and Believe.

Recovery is here! Get your vaccine as soon as you can. Share the hope the vaccine brings to our loved ones and to all those who love to travel.

My sister’s story was published by the Texas Children’s Hospital blog. It is an incredible story of a modern-day miracle.

Read and Believe. We are almost there.

Machine generated alternative text:
My COVID-19 survival story: Why you should get the
COVID-19 vaccine
January 26, 2021

https://www.texaschildrens.org/blog/my-covid-19-survival-story-why-you-should-get-covid-19-vaccine

When They Hurt, I Hurt

On January 31, 2019 By AngeliaIn In the lives of children, Into the Blender we go- Wee!9 Comments

I have four beautiful daughters. One is my blood, two are step, and one is grand.

There is something to be said about being a mother and having children. All the sudden your heart is walking outside your body. You will do anything to protect them – from heartbreak, disappointment, loss, fear, and confusion. This need to cover them from darkness is so fierce it’s hard.

So hard to let them go and watch them understand the ways of the world – some of the worst ways. The super hard ways. How people will disappoint them. Friends will turn on them. Troubles will come and go. When there are rights and wrongs, there is indifference too. Some whys we will never understand.

Your heart explodes because they are learning the way you learned. The hard way. The harsh way. The people will let you down way.

And I still want to fight for them. So what if the world can be cruel. I am still on their side. I will fight when they are hurt. When they hurt, I hurt.

My bonus girls are now 12 and 14.

I know. I know. Just yesterday they were 2 and 4. So wittle. So chubby. So very magical. And now they are dang near grown. No more chub chub cheeks or a thousand questions. But still my kids. So you know what I mean when I say I don’t want them to hurt. This is the age when the hard truth of adulthood starts to slap them around a bit. Junior High and High School? Talk about waking up from being an innocent kid. Those are the years!

And this December was another harsh jar to their childhood. Their mother disappeared for 30 days. She did not tell the girls much. She only talked to my husband. I heard her say, “It sucks. It’s bad timing.” But that’s it. No I am sorry. No forgive me. No explanation to the girls other than she was in the “hospital”. She wasn’t. We knew that from reverse number look up. But no way to tell the girls about that. It’s not our place especially since we were not even supposed to know. But it is what it is.

Except.. this hurt my children. My bonus babes. My sweet, loving girls. To have their mother vanish. During Christmas and New Year’s no less.

Now don’t get me wrong. My husband and I loved it. We got to have an unexpected month long visit. Our whole family together and during the holidays! So this was fantastic for us.

But….what about the girls? Young girls that need their Mom. Yeah, Dad is great. Stepmom is nice. But your mom is your MOM. And I know exactly what it’s like to have her gone. It hurts. When they hurt, I hurt.

December was joyful. December was awful. I felt more sick for the girls as each day passed (even into January). I still have pains for them. But I know they are young and they heal quick. She is back and all is the way it was before (I guess).

She hasn’t really talked to us about it. She came back and that was it. I guess I am having a harder time getting over it than they are. I don’t need to know all the gritty details. I don’t even want to know. I just want to hear an I’m Sorry.

I’m sorry I hurt my children. I am sorry I had to do what I had to do. I am sorry I can’t open up about it. I am sorry I have to treat you like strangers.

And what about Thank you? Thank you for keeping the girls. Thank you for caring for them when I couldn’t. Thank for being there at Christmas. Thank your for holding them while they cried on New Years Day for their mother.

I know. I am asking too much. Demanding too much. I have no right.

But someone has to stand for these children. Someone has to fight.

I will always be there for my family. For my kids. For my husband.

I can’t be sorry for that……and I won’t. Because this isn’t about me or how I want someone to act. This is about two precious girls who shouldn’t have to feel abandoned.

After a Dark and Snowy Week…

On March 6, 2015 By AngeliaIn Beautiful Life28 Comments

The sun comes out ~~to blind me~~ to brighten our days. But the snow, and ice (which is still snow to Texans) was a fun and dramatic change from our sunny 60’s (sometimes 80’s!) winter.

The Dallas metroplex is one of those areas when the weatherman says, “Snow.”

We say, “Yeah, right!”

And when he still says, “SNOW!”

We say, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Well, we believed! We believed last week and we believed this week. The magical ice and snow and allllll the blustery cold things happened. We broke out the gloves and scarves. We made chili (well, my sweet hubby made super, yummy, delicious chili). And most of the household had many wonderful snow days away from the office and school.

Except for me…because…I work for a travel agency. Even better, I supervise the EMERGENCY SERVICE Department of said travel agency. And what do you know? Snow storms and flight cancellations seem to top the #1 EMERGENCY of travelers. Huh.

But you know, with the skidding and sliding of planes off runways and such. Yeah, that. It’s kind of important that they CANCEL these precarious flights, lest you end up crashing into a ditch, screaming as you plunge down a blow-up slide while highly flammable jet fuel LEAKS nearby. So not the winter vacation you were hoping for. This is why I am happy to work snow days and keep you extra safe. You’re welcome.

But fingers crossed, someone has snuffed out that darn ground-hog and it WILL FORtheloveofGODplease be Spring real, real soon.

In the meantime, enjoy my lovely (and rare) SNOW photos. It happened. It really did.

This. This thing called snow.It is magical. I bet I’ll be eating snow balls later.

Maya kitty sees her first snow. She batted at the window like. WHAT? What is that??

I don’t understand this thing called snow. I need a nap.

It’s snow Maya. I tried to take her out to see it in person, but she FREAKED and clawed my shoulder. I think that meant – HELL NO into the snow I won’t GO!

My Anna dog runs through the snow/ice.

Anna dog and my old gal Salem have a snack of crunchy, tasty snow.

My Black Lab Salem. She is 12yrs old going on 13 this year. And she *still* loves the snow. Sweet girl.

This was the first wimpy snow. I didn’t get a pic of the bigger snow on my car.

FUN!

The girls play on the trampoline. Snowballs and jumping – what could be better?

Snowball fight!

The girls chunked ice/snow balls at Anna. I am really surprised it didn’t knock her out. She loves catching snowballs more than anything.

Anna the Snow ball catcher. Who needs a Frisbee?

This snow is swinging. Heh.

Hello Kitty in the snow.

The girls and the snow (ice).

Bridget in the snow.

Molly in the snow.

The snow melted. Some ice was left. The girls wished for more snow (they got it a week later).

But that didn’t stop them from trying to use the leftover ice/snow from the trampoline to build a ICE SLIDE.

This is what I call glorious busy work. LOVE.

Our gorgeous trees in the back.

Our nearby park as the snow was melting.

The ducks at the park. They don’t seem to mind the snow.

All the ducks in the pond took off flying as if their life depended on it. We looked up and saw this scene. Apparently, the ducks spotted this guy and knew it was feeding time. It was too funny!

Clover covered in snow. I call it my lucky heart clover.

What Love is…

On February 13, 2015February 13, 2015 By AngeliaIn Beautiful Life19 Comments

When I started this post – What Love is. I planned to write about what love means to me. How special certain people truly are. How it’s not always the outpouring of words, but the small everyday things we take for granted.

When he brings home a box of chocolate. Just because…

And it means there is sweetness beyond any kind you can buy. It represents a gesture of thought. Of being on his mind. Being on his heart. He thinks just to see you smile.

When he programs the new remote with your favorite channels.

I have the hardest time finding channels on our 400+ channel Uverse program. I end up watching the GUIDE for an hour. And for him, to always think of me, to set up my shows in a way I can access quickly. To record my favorite shows (without my asking), and to program in my channels (and knowing what they are). It may not seem like much, but the meaning isn’t lost on me. Little things done in a big way.

When a cute Valentine plant sits on the counter after he takes a trip to the store. For me? Oh that? Yeah. It’s just a little thing.

Just a little thing, but full of beauty. And not the beauty of flowers, but the beauty that love creates. One that will continue to grow.

When a person will help you launch burning lanterns into the sky in the dark of night. All for the love of your photo project when he could be in the recliner watching TV. Well, that is something special indeed. In fact, we almost lit the whole place up with the fiery glow of lanterns. Eek! Click on the gallery to read the story.

Jason launches our first balloon. It flies up and into a tree. Thankfully it burnt out and dropped into the water.

Our 2nd launch looked so pretty!

And it flies right into a TREE. This time it doesn’t fall into the water. But thankfully, it burned out without catching the park on fire. Phew!

The remenants of our burning balloon in the tree – WEEKS later.

Love is simple.

We make it complex. We put conditions on it. We decide when to give it and when to take it away.

But in the end, regardless of gifts, of deeds, of misunderstandings, of the good, and even the bad – love is complete acceptance. Complete and total acceptance of a person no matter what they do or say. No matter when or where. No matter how or why.

And then, I realized. Love is so much more than that. It encompasses family and generations. It is a kaleidoscope of moments so pure and precious they take your breath away.

I saw it so clearly this week as I did my photo shoots, for my projects, and for my family.

These wonderful people in my life that go above and beyond for my joy. How incredible is that?

To go above and beyond even at the risk of embarrassing photos.

And real love? Well, it’s family, fun, and beautiful girls (big and small).

It’s fuzzy mustaches and a heart that says hug me.

It’s very special eight-year old.

And a very mysterious debonair almost eleven-year-old.

And it’s a precious baby that is growing too fast. And a hundred times harder for Grammy to photograph.

And sometimes Grammy has to put her in a windowsill with heart gels to paste and smear on the window. So I can love every fingerprint…every smile…and every second of joy on her face as she discovers this “new” thing.