My daughter graduated May 19th in Fort Worth, Texas. I wasn’t blogging here then, but I was writing in a personal journal. I decided to revisit that amazing day and include some photographs (of course!).
Written – May 19th, 2012
I can’t believe this day is here. The year 2012 seemed a lifetime ago when she started kindergarten with her brand new back pack on that tiny little body. I remember she was SO excited. She really just wanted me to leave her so she could start BIG school and learn to read.
Her childhood was so much fun. She constantly smiled and entertained. There truly wasn’t a dull moment with her (the good kind).
I guess her grade school years have passed – a lifetime from kindergarten to twelfth grade.
I truly don’t regret having her at the young age of 22.
I had more energy, more patience, and now? I think I reap more rewards, or maybe I’m just SO HAPPY I succeeded as a young mother barely more than a child myself.
I did it. I raised her. She is done (pretty much) this is one of the proudest days of my life.
More so, because she turned out to be such a great girl. Kind, carefree, fun…..beautiful inside and out.
Yep, I am one impressed mama.
These are the moments that can’t be missed.
Today, I celebrate this accomplishment. I celebrate one end of her life and the beginning of another.
I thought I would be so sad. I had no idea how completely amazing it would feel. A mix of pure joy and relief.
Thanks for flashing back to that beautiful day in May.
As Pomp And Circumstance began to play. The girls and I scour the bobbing hats and streaming tassels looking for the one we want to see. Dad. The one we have been waiting to watch walk down the aisle. The one Molly asked if his graduation was starting every three minutes for the last half hour (I’m not kidding).
There he is, the other aisle past our section, if you squint, you can see the happy grad giving us a wave. He saw us!
I think the girls felt assured that you were in fact there after they saw you. How you saw us in that crowd from across the room – I have no idea.
I have not graduated from college, nor been to college. I don’t know the sacrifice involved. I don’t know the deadlines, the reports, or the group projects. I’ve never taken a college exam, nor studied for a final. I haven’t experienced it. I just don’t know. But…..
I do know for over a year, I watched a single dad working full-time and attending class from 6p-10pm two nights a week in an accelerated masters program. He gave up nights of movie dates, dinners, watching his favorite TV shows, and sleep to study. He spent evenings on conference calls with classmates to complete group projects. He took weekends to burrow in his office and study for the final exam after a fast paced six-week class. He made almost straight A’s.
I couldn’t have done it. Not with the pressure of life. Not with the craziness of kids, an ex, and visitation schedules that don’t take into consideration study time, due dates, and exams. But he did. He made it look easy. And although I can’t fully understand the experience, I can be in awe of his dedication and determination.
Master of Science in Information Systems from the College of Business at UTA…..I don’t even have words to express the magnitude of your success. An achievement most people only think about attaining (but never do).
Your daughters and I, after catching your smiling wave, watched with pride as the rest of the grads filed in one by one and the speeches began. Glancing at the sea of hats and tassels, feeling the resolving strength it took to wear those gowns, knowing each person had a story – a sacrifice – to get there. I got a little teary. Bridget rubbed and patted my arm snuggled next to me. I felt so lucky to be there witnessing that moment with your children, your brother, your step-dad, and your miraculous mother – all watching – all proud.
We listened to the encouragement from speakers alternating girls between laps and chairs. Every few minutes I would assure them Daddy was right there (pointing to all the grads in the direction you sat) and you would be crossing that big stage real soon.
I watched them closely for any sign of returning illness they had that morning (the throwing up kind). If they had still been sick, they would not have been able to attend. You would have been crushed. I would have shrugged it off as they are too little anyway, but my heart would have hurt for you. So praise God, they were well for your special event. Praise God, they spotted you headed for the stage and despite clapping for EVERY name called Jason. They did finally get the “right” Jason. They were so happy to see you on stage. We cheered our hearts out.
I watched you on that stage through a 200mm lens lit up with the triumph and victory of a masters degree.
You did it. You, and no one else.
Congratulations Jason; my super smart hero who uses bigger words than this Oklahoma (schooled) non-edumacated girl knows (wink).
I truly thought you were crazy to take this on with two young children. I think I said, “Are you mad?”
Now I know, you are not crazy. You are not mad as a hatter. Just super intelligent, driven, and proficient at what you do. Driven by a want to go above and beyond, not just for yourself, but for your children’s future.
I love you dad grad.
I cherish my life with you. I cherish your desire to always be the best.