I remember my first Mother’s Day. My daughter had just been born. A soft and tiny miracle. I inhaled her fresh baby scent and enjoyed being a Mom for the first time; a mere two days after she came into our life.
My Mom brought me a little corsage to wear that Sunday. I even kept it, all dried up, with my daughter’s baby keepsake things.
And now, twenty years later, I spend her first Mother’s day with her, her daughter, and my Mom-in-law (who I call Mom too!). As in… she is my Mom, too.
We visited the beautiful Weston Gardens in Bloom in Fort Worth, Texas. We sat among the flowers and listened to harp and violin music play. The notes sounding even more classical in the setting. We sipped on a variety of teas and nibbled on cookies. We even got to pick out a free Mother’s Day plant for being there. A gift to remember…to nurture and take care of. No wonder they gave them to Moms.
I have to say…this place is gorgeous. Every area you go to is like a different room in a different garden. I would love to go back before it gets super hot to explore some more. I really only scratched the surface of this place.
I took some photos of Sydney and Averey. Nothing formal as Sydney worked earlier in the day and she is still wearing her “uniform”.
But I didn’t want to forget her first Mother’s Day with Averey. And my heart soared a bit that she shared her special Mother’s Day with her own Mom, too.
I’d say it is a tradition we haven’t missed yet. Twenty years, if you are counting…
Hope you had a fabulous weekend. I hope you hugged a Mother (or two).
I know I am not the perfect step-in parent for your children. I make mistakes. I misjudge. I get frustrated, confused, and conflicted. It’s a tight wire balance of being too close and being too far.
I don’t want to overstep my boundaries. And yet, I sometimes lose track of the rule book. I don’t always know what to expect. And even when I think I do, I realize how far-off the beaten path I really am. I manage the best I can for them. Not necessarily as another parent, but someone who loves being in their life. Someone who cares for them, because I care for their Dad. But, I fail. I try. I fail. Then I brush myself off and hope you can forgive me.
From the first moment I met them, I wanted them to know I could never replace you, nor would I want to, or seek to. I have always felt that way.
I remember seeing a plump two-year old baby about six years ago. I wanted to scoop her into my arms and gobble up those chub chub cheeks of hers. Instead, I waited and watched, until she felt comfortable with me. It took more than a year.
At the same time, I met a precocious, wiser-than-her-years four-year-old, spitting spunk and sass. I wanted to take her hand and run off into the land of make-believe. Instead, I told her how mommy is magical and I would never have that magic, because her mommy is very special like that.
I want to guide them as much as I can without making waves or being a disciplinary figure. On the same note, I want to keep them safe. I want to protect them from the big scary world. I have the heart of a mother, but the mind of step mom. I want their dreams to come true. I want their success and happiness to follow them wherever they go.
And yet…
I am only a small part of their world. You are their caretaker, guide, and example. You are their lifeline, their planner, and the one who tucks them in. Your soul is part of those two little bodies. Even when it is not your weekend, you are very much part of their every second with us.
And because you are so much part of them? Two little people I adore… I adore you just as much. I appreciate you more than you know. I can’t imagine life without you, your ex, and those precious little people I get to hug and worry over.
So please know, although I mess up and forget to remind my husband of holidays, birthdays, and presents. Although, I don’t always reach out, in an effort to keep in, just know I hold your family dear to my heart. I am always here. Trying my best and admiring the hell out of you.
Thank-you for our two little stars who I get to watch grow into lovely young ladies. Thank-you for sacrificing so many things to give these kids a life with both parents taking part. And thank-you for your kindness in letting me be a small piece of their great big world.
This year I did not let Mother’s Day slip by unattended. I planned and I hope you love it as much as I love your two children. This is for you. I thought a vintage pearl might last longer than flowers or chocolate.
Happy Mother’s Day!
Drawing for Dad by the youngest daughter. I love how she didn’t quite get us holding hands. To make up for that she puts a circle between our hands to connect us, too. From the mind of a beautiful seven-year-old who wants her family holding hands. So sweet.
It’s all about happy times this last week. Lots of joys, birth milestones, and appreciation for the family we have – by birth, by marriage, by choice. Here are some of my memories frozen for your viewing pleasure (and yes, I still loooove my camera).
Sydney’s Doll Cake.
Morning of her 16th birthday – the most emotional birthday for me, so far.
Something about being two years from 18. I’m told it only gets better from here. That is really comforting to know.
A pinata for a six year old.
Water slide extraordinaire making a splash on her birthday.
Swimming end of April…….only in Texas.
Molly, I hope you never change, stay sweet and funny. Love the look. This will be a great blackmail pic. HA.
Giving thanks for this mom for giving birth to my future husband (on the left), for being Grandma of two amazing little girls (and the many other gorgeous grandchilden), and for giving so much of her heart to her family. You are beautiful inside and out. You can be proud of the family you created.
A Mom and her miracle baby, Mother’s Day 2010.
It’s all about joy my friends. If you don’t have it, get it. If you get it, share it.
Happy Mother’s Day to all Moms; young and old, new and experienced, with and without child.
I hope today more than any other you know you how important you are. How precious you are to the family. How precious you are to life itself. How beautiful it is to see a mother with their child.
The Church I attend has all the Moms stand up, then everyone claps. And claps. And claps. At that point it gets a little uncomfortable….oh gosh is that for little ol’ me? But as the clapping continues – louder and stronger – something happens that makes moms stand a little taller. Pride. Not only is that for me, I deserve that. Our jobs are so hard, some days, even impossible. THEN, the clapping goes on and it just bubbles up joy and laughter. Pretty soon, we are all enjoying it, looking at other Moms with smiles, cheers, and waves. Dancing just a little because guess what? They are still clapping.
I hope every Mom feels that honor today. Maybe it’s not clapping, but lunch, or a card, even flowers. Maybe it’s something from a child made especially for you. And maybe it’s just having that child to hug or one you are waiting to hug in heaven.
I lost six pregnancies. From age 21 to age 35. I will always wonder what it would be like to have them. Always. Today more than any other day. Maybe you can’t have children. Not even one. Today, I hope someone reaches out in kindness. I hope you can hug your mom, your grandma, or a special niece or nephew. Just know you are not forgotten.
I also want to recognize all the Moms out there that choose motherhood; an adopted child, a blended family, a foster parent. You choose the possibility that one day that child will say, “You’re not my Mom.”
But you love them anyway, you endure the unendurable, because your heart doesn’t stop beating – no matter how many times it’s stomped on. I hope today you reap rewards for those deeds that many parents can not even comprehend. You are so very special.
Give yourself a hand, lift your head in honor. Let your heart do the smiling. Stand and enjoy the honor you so richly deserve – today and always.
Happy Mother’s Day! I’m clapping for you!
Tomorrow, I am guest posting a childhood story from my Mom. You don’t want to miss it. Be sure to come back for the link.
Living, Loving, Laughing.... 