Zombie Dreams in the Unapocalypse

I have two recurring dreams.

Zombies and Aliens.

I blame my parents divorce and weekend’s at Dad’s when I was too little to watch horror movies. He loved horror flicks. Almost as much as he loved staying up late, and eating Tony’s pizza smothered in mozzarella.

I grew to love them too. Then, I got old and didn’t like being scared in a movie anymore. Give me a chick flick any day and yet….I still dream in horror? Maybe, I still have a hidden love for it? Is that inherited?

Normally my standard Zombie Dream involves a race to the “safe” place which happens to be a graveyard on a hill. Yeah. I don’t get the logic either. I don’t why it is holy ground, but it is. Ha. My Dad had quite the sense of humor too. And maybe that is from him.

This Zombie Dream was a little different. You either got sick with the flu and that’s it, or you got sick with the flu, and turned into a brain-eating Zombie.

In my dream, I saw many family members rushing to be at the side of their sick child or spouse and I wanted to say, “Noooooo! Don’t do it! You are going to be a Zombie!”

But in the end, I wondered………if one my family got sick with the Zombie Flu……..wouldn’t I be there? Or would I run away and save myself?

Maybe this wasn’t my typical run-for-your-life Zombie Dream. Maybe this one had depth. The meaning of life and family embedded into the flesh of it. It had brains (heh!).

I awoke before finding a safe place. I awoke before the world ended. I awoke before my family was infected and I had to make that decision.

My only explanation for this dream is dealing with the after-math of injuries from the Jeep wreck. It’s been three weeks and the injuries are healing, but the wounds are still fresh in my mind.

Not to mention, I had the most traumatic encounter to date earlier in the week. Here is how it happened………

I woke up. I let the dogs out of their crates. I went to the bedroom door and opened it. The dogs (as they always do) raced ahead to the living room. We have a routine of potty time, then breakfast time, and they get soo, soo, soo very excited about that. Normally, Sydney is getting ready in the bathroom and I wave at her as I walk by the doorway in the hall.

Except, this time, when I waved I felt something under my foot (my bare foot).

It didn’t feel right.

I looked down as it’s head came up and it’s eyes bulged out (because I was stepping on it).

Stepping on a snake – IN THE HALLWAY – of my house! Inside. My house. My safe place. Ahhhhhhhhh!

I really didn’t scream. I just kinda choked and I ran. I left my teen daughter in the bathroom where the snake was headed.

I took the dogs outside, trying to shake the utter terror out of my sight. But I couldn’t (still can’t). When I got back in the house, Sydney was safe in the living room (phew!). The snake was safe(?) in the bathroom. I took one look and knew I couldn’t handle it. I know it’s not that big and all, but still, it can jump.

I had to wake up my injured husband – who is terrified of snakes. Probably more than me, which makes me really glad I stepped on it and not him (sorta).

At that point it was by the tub. Of course I took pictures for my blog to remember this event.

Not only did I survive the apocalypse of 2011, but I survived stepping on a snake in my house.

No wonder I have Zombie Dreams.

To date, I am a paranoid walker. I don’t step anywhere without looking……..I carry a flashlight (my iPhone) at all times, because I don’t want to cross paths with this again ~shudder~.

Jason put our reptile house mate back in the yard…..in hopes it would find another home….hopefully?…it did…..to be continued.

Diary of a Hospital Honeymoon

Day 1-

ER is so cool! I feel like I’m in a TV show. Any minute a crash cart will go flying by and a miraculous life will be saved. Gosh, Jason sure looks uncomfortable on that stretcher bed. Maybe, I should hold his hand. It’s so neat when he calls me his wife. That’s me! Now they are admitting him for a night. Oh boy, that sounds scary. But how bad could ONE night be? Surely, they will have it all figured out by tomorrow. This will be fun! I’ll make it fun. Ohhhhh, look at our room. It’s nice. It has three windows with nice wood blinds and we have a tree view. Cool! The nurse gave me pillows and blankets for my fold out chair bed. I’m such a good wife to sleep next my hubby even in the hospital. My poor honey. What a crazy honeymoon, we will always remember this.

Day 2-

Luckily someone came by to bring me hot food. Every time I leave the room to pee or get coffee a doctor comes by and I miss what they say. I’m determined to never leave or shower again. That bed was hard and makes terrible sounds when I turn over. Someone must have turned on the lights and came in the room almost every hour. Uuuggh. My poor husband. I am so glad we are married so I can be by his side. They call us the newlyweds and tease that they have to knock before they enter our room. Isn’t that cute? The dumb doctors still don’t know anything. It’s Friday and they are ready for the weekend. They can’t even tell us when we might be able to leave. Another night camping for us, I should pick up some more trail mix the next vending machine run. I’ll have to hurry so I don’t miss a doctor or a nurse. Why don’t they know what’s wrong yet? Maybe the test Monday will give us answers. I can totally do this wait it out thing. We took vows people.

Day 3-

Jason was up all night going to the bathroom. Looks like the diuretics kicked in. I totally slept through the whole thing on my chair bed. I only woke up twice when they took vitals and turned on the lights. I’m getting really good about being able to sleep through those. He said I was snoring. I guess he is a little grumpy from not having a lot of sleep. Gee. At least he is looking better and is not as puffy. I was afraid they’d have to cut the new wedding ring off. Now, that would be sad. I am really ready for him to be better. I was looking forward to the movies this weekend. I guess he wasn’t faking it last week when he was complaining of feeling bad. Heck, we just didn’t have time to be sick in the middle of wedding planning. My sister and her husband came back up and I sure had a nice visit away from the hospital. I didn’t even miss anything. How cool is that? I loved being treated to lunch and dinner. Jason has been feeling nauseated. I’m not sure if it’s his mystery illness or the hospital food. I think that hospital food is real awful. Sure looks it. The doctors still know NOTHING. What a waste of medical school. So glad I said I DO before we got here. I just love being his wife.

Day 4 –

Holy crap, my back huuurts. Ow that &*(@# bed. That’s not a bed, it’s a back twisting torture device. And how many times do they have to check him at night? I mean really? Don’t they have monitors they can watch? And do they have to be so loud in the hall? It sounded like a party. Gah. I haven’t had a decent cup of coffee in four days. FOUR. I stole some of the bath baby wipes to “freshen” up. I don’t think anyone will notice. I wish I could have warmed them up like they did for him. Today is the day Jason has to get up and walk the hall. We are calling it our honeymoon stroll. Aww. Just like the beach (sorta).

My new husband in all his hospital gown hotness.

It’s Sunday, so of course, no one knows what is wrong with him yet. The fill-in doctors come by to check-in. They just mark their visit in the books. They don’t do anything. Jason’s feet touch the end of the bed. I think he is too big for it. It sure doesn’t look comfortable. Not looking forward to laying in the torture device tonight. I have a permanent crick in my lower back left side now. Supposedly, there are tests in the morning but they can’t say for sure since the doc did not order them before he was off for the weekend. What kind of hospital is this? I am soooo ready to go home. This wifely thing is hard.

Day 5-

I have to sit down like an old person. My back is cracked. I must leave here and get Tylenol soon. Ouch. Maybe they will do the test and we can go home. Jason looks worse. I think this hospital made him sicker. I held his hand and knocked his IV astray. It caused bleeding. Oh gee. I didn’t mean to. This is sooo not fun anymore. I cried and felt very selfish. I am just soooo tired of not doing anything. It’s like there is no time here. It’s the same time every day. The only change is the nurses. I found the cafeteria. I am afraid to eat there after seeing Jason’s food and stuck with the vending machines again. Everyone is working so I ran out for hot food while Jason was taken for a CT scan on his head.The doctors decided not to do the heart cath test they prepared us for. Apparently, they made Jason dehydrated with all the diuretics. He lost 11 liters of fluid and dried out his kidneys. Now, he can’t tolerate the dye. Two days ago it was a must do. Now, he doesn’t need it. I hate this place! They can just say whatever they want and they STILL don’t know what is wrong with him. Looks like an extended honeymoon for us. Woo! I cleaned the room and organized our belongings. I used a bath wipe to clean my phone and wipe off his rolling tray. This place is making me weird crazy. But we are making newlywed memories. P.S. I might be committed soon…….

Happy honeymoon sweetie!

To be continued……

You may take my data plan but you can’t take my apps

Countdown begins 1 year and 72 days. Thanks AT&T, because that is how long I have until my contract expires and you ding me with “new” data limits.

I am just not a data limit kinda girl. That’s not how I roll.

Didn’t you hear my beloved Mac is coming out with a new toy? A toy I must have as soon as I can upgrade (1 year and 72 days, but who is counting).

An app-tabulous invasion of the 4th kind.

Please tell me you don’t want to cap my app and data surf obsession with loopholes and limits. Hello? It’s a 4. Look I use at least 2GB of data now and I only have 3GS iPhone. I don’t know where you get your consumer numbers, but they are all kinds of wrong about a measly 200MB data use . And with a new processor, faster downloads, and more apps on the horizon – listen and hear Apple roar!

I can see you don’t believe my data obsession. Fine.

Let me take you through a day of the app that’s called my life. This is a reenactment, any similarity to your iPhone app day is strictly coincidence. Dates and times on iPhone will be incorrect. Mkay?

6:30am- My iPhone alarm wakes me.

I check my email, and my text messages before I even get out of bed. Hey, you never know, it could be important. I might have missed something in the wee hours of the night.

I check the weather.
Of course, this time of year in Texas it’s the same. HOT. Triple digits. ORANGE pollution alert. Did I mention HOT? So that’s the weather til…..oh…..about November, maybe I don’t have to check that app anymore.

If I snoozed on my alarm (I did, trust me, I did) then I might not have time to catch up on the local news. No problem! There’s an app for that.
Headlines check!

Maybe it’s time to make the donuts, or go to work. Let’s see, I need my keys, and my iPhone – purse optional. Heh!

The new stereo in my car (Sydney’s car) has a direct plug-in for my iPhone. A USB connection to get clearer sound. You can listen to your music or even a podcast wherever you go. No headphones needed.
It’s super cool. My new car MUST have this option.

I guarantee you by noon, I have visited these – my most favorite – of apps.

I’ve also opened safari to surf the web, read and comment on blogs, plus ask Google a question. I mean you can’t get through a day without needing a Google answer, right? Most recently I even used my IMDB app to search for a movie in the works. I wanted to know what actors were cast and see if they matched who everyone in the office decided should play the roles. It’s a favorite book we collectively read being made into a movie now.

Lunch time? Can’t decide where to go or what to eat? No problem.
Flip a coin app.

Not sure how to get there? Use the map app to search and route from your current position.

While going to lunch, I’m stopped at a stoplight and see this guy…
I deftly snap a shot with my iPhone camera. I don’t want to miss the SCARIEST Homer Simpson – ever. He has to be sweating.

If bored at work (okay – that NEVER happens), so let’s say – if riding surviving in the car with a teenage driver. The game apps work great to take your mind off it. Bubble pop and Simon says are very addicting and time-consuming.

I balance my bank accounts – on my apps. Pay bills – by app. Record a voice memo. Make a to do list. All by app.

End of the day, I try to exercise. I like the gym okay, but my favorite exercise is riding my bicycle. Most especially when it’s 100 degrees out and I can at least feel a breeze when pedaling fast. Walking or running? Forget it. I’d end up a puddle half-way out the door. I ride about three miles down the road to a local city park. It’s got TONS of trials. The scenery is spectacular; winding paths, wild animals, and beautiful trees. I’ve seen an armadillo, a brown snake, a green snake, and to date TWO bobcats. I only got a picture of the armadillo. Frankly, I am NOT stopping to ask a snake or a bobcat to say cheese, just sayin’.
iPhone pic of an armadillo.

Now I’m a little obsessed with apps, yes? And I REALLY like knowing how many miles/minutes/calories I have burned on my little bike adventures. That’s where my handy-dandy runkeeper app comes in. It does more than running, oh yes, it does cycling too. Now I know my little trail ride that I love to traverse is 12 MILES. Yeah!

After a long app filled day. I cuddle up with my iPhone and turn on my irelax app.
I drift off to sleep meditating to sweet ocean waves while a flute plays. Goodnight mail. Goodnight safari. Goodnight tweeps and Facebook peeps.

This was my day, and I didn’t even scratch the surface of apps. Didn’t you see this new unveiling?

My current app obsession ends 1 year and 72 days. New app obsession to begin soon. iPhooooonneeeee 4!

AT&T you are going to make a bundle on my data plan.